Conversation with a non-believer

I have just met this guy today who made a couple of statements about Christianity, including that Christians should "respect others' faith", moral values are "relative", and that he simply doesn't like "my God".

Instead of jumping straight into a tirade against him and his arguments (as often I'm tempted to do so, but by the grace of God to remind myself that the manner of testimony should be gentle instruction), I think there is much to learn from a non-believer point of view. Often in Christians' zealousness to share the truth, we have forsaken humility and gentleness. One ought to learn from Apostle Paul, who, under the slander of the false teachers, restrained himself with great maturity to appeal with "the meekness and gentleness of Christ" (2 Cor 10:1). The first thing in conversations is to remind ourselves the need for self-examination. One is unlikely to give regard to a heavenly message when the prophet's life is so contradictory to that glorious reality. It helps if one prays for humility, especially one who has great intellect to win arguments.

Yet at the same time, the phrase "respect others' faiths" itself has become a common catchphrase for anyone who wishes to avoid religious or value discussions, or for anyone who rejects the notion of an absolute truth. A lady in VCF (Varsity Christian Fellowship) recently wrote on the challenge of an Arts student with a Christian faith struggling to reconcile the "absoluteness" of her faith with the relativistic way her studies are carried out. Simply put, there is no correct answer, and the "correct answer" is the argument that is most cleverly argued (nevermind that it may be wrong!).

So it is with the way the same guy told me that values are relative. In response to my statement that murder is wrong, he retorted that murder is only wrong sometimes, such as in war, where murder is justified. I don't see how that makes values relative, so my reply to him is that even under special circumstances, there is no way to escape an absolute way of viewing values. "Murder" (which in war shouldn't and isn't called as such) as an act of self-defence is not wrong, while there is still such a thing as war crimes in war! Otherwise the just war theory is simply gibberish, and Hitler can never be labeled "evil" by anyone.

I suspect that many atheists and non-religious people are borrowing from the Judeo-Christian tradition when they judge and make truth claims that there is no such thing as God, or ironically, no such thing as the truth! As a matter of fact they are "absolutists" to some extent, though they deny it. I began to imagine what it feels like to be a complete relativist, which of course I have never seen one, or at least a completely consistent one.

How does one live when there are no fixed values and all things are measured by man? By a sinful creature like me? Like you? I think all hell will break loose. I look at the social institutions in our world and thank God for His common grace in restraining evil. But let's not look at the temporal peace we enjoy and think how great we are.

For the Christian of course, truth is not an argument, nor is it an intellectual exercise. It is not even something to discover by ourselves until we "finally got it". Truth is a person, and that person is Christ, God manifest in flesh. He is the Ruler to measure right and wrong. He is the Ruler that our sinful wills and minds must submit to. To the Pontius Pilates who ask "what is truth?"(John 18:38), He replies, "I am the way and the truth and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me." (John 14:6)

Let's not pretend that we can live relativistically, without a Ruler to measure things, without any authority to submit to, without any consequences to face, without any purpose to live, without any meaning to believe. Such a life is unviable.